The Cross

Viewing my life in light of the cross I have found a few things to be irreversibly and absolutely true. One, I am a wicked, sinful depraved, wretched man. Two, Christ is glorious, beautiful, and passionately after my heart. There is no way, in light of the cross that a man can be prideful. If one truly understands the cross then they understand that it is an emblem of shame, wrath, and pain. There is nothing glorious about the cross, save the man who died upon it. By ascribing to believe in the cross of calvary, we admit that without Christ we are the most pitiful souls in the universe and deserve nothing except punishment and wrath for our own disobedience. 

However, through the beautiful and perfect work of Christ on the cross, we stand justified only through His atoning sacrifice. Thus, without Christ, we are still at enmity with God, alone in the world, and pitiable above all men. Therefore, there is no room for pride on the cross, only our shame. It is impossible to put into words the feeling that washes over me even as I type. The sense of disgust that I feel for my own soul, yet the sense of absolute warmth and love that I feel at the thoughts of the God of the Universe abasing himself for the glory of His name, in order that I may also share in His life through His death. 

How we Christians flippantly toss around the cross as if it were pretty. By making the cross pretty we have robbed if it of its absolute power and might. By providing the cross as a sexy escape from hell to the world we have prostituted the gospel and stripped the cross of its beauty. The cross holds it beauty in its rugged form and frame. The cross is hard and holds nothing, but death. Yet, a seed must first fall into the ground and die in order that life might be brought forth. Death must come for us. As was said by A.W. Tozer, a man of God to be admired, "There are only two responses to the cross. Either you die on it, or you run from it, there is no third option. And if we are foolish and futile enough to run from it, we rob it of all of its power and glory that it holds." The death that is imminent for all of us looms in the shadows. We all will die one day. Mel Gibson playing William Wallace, the great Scottish warrior in Braveheart, quotes " Every man dies, but few men truly live." I would add to that and say every man dies and without dying, one can never truly live. The cross is looming. It hangs as a reminder in the hearts of people all over the world every day of Christ's atoning sacrifice. 

The words of my God pace through my head "Anyone who will follow me must take up his cross, daily and follow me." In order to enter into discipleship with Christ, we must die to ourselves and continue to do so. Christ make sit evident to us all that the cross is not only for Him, but also for any follower that is called by His name. And so the cross stands in my thoughts and mind as a sobering reminder:

I am wicked, sinful, depraved and found wanting, yet Christ has paid for my trespasses and I stand justified. However, the question for me still remains. Christ has bore His cross for all of mankind, yet will I bear mine?

Prayer

Caught in the everyday doings of ministry, we all find ourselves wanting and seemingly knowing we need prayer, however, few men actually find themselves on their knees. Yet, how can we neglect the source of life that we preach we all must glean from? We preach Christ and his strength powerfully working within us, yet we are for the most part not very strong and anything but powerful in our lifestyles. In fact, if our lives were examined from the outside, we may not even necessarily look much different from the world. The world could never have a chance to hate us because sadly we are much more friend than foe to their worldview. How did it get this way? Perhaps it is due to the lack of passionate, fervent prayer in our lives. We are much more apt to work on a budget spreadsheet, a promotional flyer, or even a sermon or perhaps have lunch with yet another leader. The prayer closet has been left to the old widows of the church and the few strung out hyper-charismaniacs that seem to have sipped a little too much of the communion wine. We have much more important things to deal with and of course we don't want to come off as too "spiritual" to our people. So it is necessary for us to keep the prayer life at home and perhaps schedule out the quiet time. Suppress it to a thirty minute morning devotional where more than likely we aren't praying as much as we are vegetating, staring into the shower head wondering why we are up so early and not still in bed. This has become the prayer life of most pastors and even more comical amongst young pastors. What are the young pastors excuses? They are equally if not more comical. Our excuses are filled with complaints about what "this generation" responds to and mumblings about the need to contextualize as if the best evangelism strategy to this generation has changed since the book of Acts. Then it was prayer and study and now it is making Jesus hip. No, the prayer closet is not pretty. It is not glamorous. It is filled with angst. It is consumed in solitude. It calls the best of us liars and the most spiritual of us children. Prayer alone is the only responsibility that anyone can fulfill, yet none can receive glory. Yet, Christ has called us to it. Not only to pray, but to do it alone and often. The most fearful realization of all is that the only thing that keeps us from praying like we know we should is pride and idolatry. Somehow we believe that we are sufficient to fulfill ourselves without it which is ultimate pride. Since we don't spend our time with him, we are spending it elsewhere which we evidently think is more efficient, which in turn makes whatever is getting our time our makeshift god. Relationships, trinkets, toys, radios, ipods, computer screens, books, and yes even people become our makeshift gods. Yet, comically enough we find it unbelievable that our people are being ravaged by the enemy, or we aren't growing personally, or that our ministry isn't pressing forward, but that it is stagnant and all the while Christ is standing at the edge of our agenda calling us to fellowship. Pleading with us to converse with Him. Yet, we are busy. We have a ministry to run. Oh the day that we realize that Christ is the essence of all that we seek and that by neglecting Him we have lost our soul. Even if we have gained the whole world, if we lose Christ in the process, we have lost everything and we should be pitied above all men.

"One thing I have asked of the Lord and that will I seek after; that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, to gaze upon the beauty of the Lord and to inquire in his temple.." - Psalm 27:4

"As a deer pants for flowing streams, so my soul pants for you, O God. My soul thirsts for God, for the living God.... My tears have been my food day and night..." - Psalm 42:1-2, 3

"For God alone my soul awaits in silence; from him comes my salvation. He only is my rock and my salvation, my fortress; I shall not be greatly shaken. Psalm 62:1-2

O how the words of David ring true to my soul. While outwardly I waste away inwardly I long to be renewed, yet how if not my the precious word of Christ? It is yet impossible. How can we live a life like Christ if we do not find our strength in the source of life that is Christ.

Father, grant us the mercy to be men of prayer. Passionate and eager to fall on our knees and plead on behalf of our family, our flock, and ourselves. Provide for us a holy conviction that leads to repentance. Let our lives be saturated with prayers for our people.

In Christ's precious name,

Amen